Dry as a desert

An education administrator went to visit a university that was in the middle of nowhere.  That is to say, the university was the town – except for a grain elevator and a 25 employee factory that assembled sporting goods.  It was a cordial visit and at the end of a few days there, the administrator was driven to the nearest airport, about three hours away, for his return home.  The flight was late, then quite late when a crew member came to tell the man, who was the sole passenger getting on the plane at that airport, that something on the plane needed to be fixed.  The administrator was informed that he would have to fly out the next morning instead, but not to worry since the airline would put him up at the airport hotel.  
 
Everyone was very pleasant when he checked in and by now evening was coming on so the man asked if the hotel had a restaurant.  No, he was told, but there was a Taco Bell down the road a piece.  “Is it within walking distance?” he asked.  It was about 10 miles away, but he could call a taxi from town.  Since the airport and accompanying hotel were some distance from town, the taxi would charge $20 to come out to the hotel to pick him up and another $20 to bring him back.  The administrator decided that he hadn't seen a Taco Bell that was worth a $40 round trip ride (no offense to Taco Bell lovers).  

Complaints Cure

A man goes to a diner every day and he orders lunch. Afterward the manager asks him how he liked his meal. The old man replies, “It was good, but you could give me a little more bread.”
So, the next day the manager tells the waitress to give the man two slices of bread this time. Afterward he asks, “How was your meal today?”
“It was good,” the man replies, “but you could give me a little more bread.”
So the next day the manager tells the waitress to give the man four slices of bread.
“How was your meal today?” the manager asks.
“It was good,” he replies, “but you could give me a little more bread.”

Understanding Forgiveness

There’s a story about a man bitten by a dog that was later discovered to have rabies.  The man was rushed to the hospital where tests revealed that he, too, had contracted the dreaded disease.  At the time, medical science had not yet discovered a cure for rabies, so the doctor had the difficult task of informing his patient that his condition was both incurable and terminal.  “Sir, we’ll do all we can to make you comfortable, but I suggest that you quickly get your affairs in order,” the doctor advised.  The dying man sank back on his bed in shock.  After a few minutes he summoned the strength to ask for a pen and paper.  He then began to write with great energy.  An hour later the doctor stopped by to check up on his patient, who was continuing to write vigorously.  “I’m glad to see you’re working on your will,” the doctor said.  “This ain’t no will,” the man answered.  “This is a list of all the people I’m going to bite before I die!”